My Nope Tropes

Although I've grown as a reader and branched out of my comfort zone several times, there are a few things that I'd rather not spend time on.

There are a handful of themes that have disappointed or annoyed me time and time again. It's not for a lack of trying—I've tried various versions and disregarded my hesitation if they're by authors whose works I've liked. Apart from the very rare exceptions that I was able to enjoy, they've not been my thing. And hence, I stay away from them.

This week's Top Ten Tuesday prompt is "buzzwords or phrases that make me want to read (or avoid) a book" but since I did My Top Ten Bookish Lures only recently, it makes sense to talk about the opposite list today. Most of these are focused on the romance genre because that's what I've read the most of, enough to know that I definitely hate some tropes haha.

Grab a drink and settle down on your couch, let's talk about tropes that make you go 🙅🏻‍♀️

1. insta lust

I read a lot of romance books and I dislike about half of them because of this. By "insta lust", I mean stories where the characters are almost instantly attracted to each others' looks and/or their relationship starts off of and is based on their sexual chemistry.

There are, in my opinion, way too many books where the main characters see each other, instantly want to get a room, and just continue being together because the sex was good. I guess I understand attraction but I don't understand it when that's the whole base of the relationship. So many stories with insta lust go on don't have anything else holding up the relationship. The characters get into a fight? They make up by having sex. The characters are upset? Same. And so on.

I don't mind stories where it starts with instant attraction but the characters still get to know each other before they date or fall in love. I hate stories where the sexual attraction is the only thing they have going for them. Why would I read 300 pages of it when I don't believe in the story or their "happy ending"? I don't get it and I hate reading about it.

Romance is my favourite genre partly because I love seeing so many different ways of connection, relationships, and life. The ending is very similar but there are so many ways to get there. I like that it's intriguing while being predictable. Insta lust absolutely ruins it for me though.

2. love triangles

I barely made it through the YA trilogy boom where the main trope was love triangles. I've had enough. I'll admit, there are a few books that I enjoyed which had love triangles but they were the exceptions. Unless a story has other elements that I absolutely love to make up for the potential frustration of the love triangle, I stay away.

I hate how the trope is almost always similar—a devastatingly handsome "bad boy" who's secretly soft in some ways, a sweet dude who is reliable and predictable, and an indecisive girl. (I haven't read many books where the love triangle was with 2 girls and 1 boy so I can't comment on that.) It's usually pretty obvious who the girl is going to end up with because of the way the author writes (and it's usually the "bad boy").

Stories with love triangles (usually) spend so much time on the push-and-pull between the two love interests that the rest of the plot feels like a background track. Reading from the girl's POV is frustrating too. I do not have the patience for it.

3. teacher-student romance

NOPE. No. No no no no.

I hate every version of this. Teacher/professor-student, TA and student, whatever. I hate it because it's an unequal relationship. One person has power over the other and even the slightest issues in either the classroom or relationship affect all areas so badly.

I don't care how the story is set up to make the characters feel like they're on an equal footing. I don't care if the teacher is younger and the student is older. I don't care if they drag it out until they're no longer in that dynamic. I don't care if they both make big promises about how their positions won't affect their relationship.

The only way I would accept this is if they are not romantically inclined at all during their teacher-student duration or if they immediately cut off the power imbalance. For example, I loved The Exception to the Rule in which the dude immediately quit as her TA and pursued her only when he didn't have power over her.

4. workplace romance

I dislike this because of the power imbalance too. To be fair, there are many workplace romances where there's no power imbalance and the relationship doesn't directly have the power to hurt the characters' lives if their relationship goes wrong. However, there are a lot of books that stay in that zone unapologetically and play with the imbalance. I hate that.

There have been a few workplace romances that I've enjoyed. My top one is probably P.S. You're Intolerable because it had great characters who bonded very slowly and cautiously and weren't the type to ruin their careers over romance. It addressed the power imbalance by both addressing it seriously and doing something about it so that they're confident that they don't ruin each other.

In most workplace romance books that I've read, their roles actively affect their relationship or their relationship/attraction affects their careers or their work. In many of them, it actually blows back on them, usually the one at the lower position. There's so much at stack in a workplace so yeah I hate reading about it. There are a few gems but I dislike most of them.

5. age gap romance

By age gap, I mean romances where one person in the relationship is not yet an independent adult. That is my bar. I don't mind it if there's a 500-year difference in their age if the younger person is financially independent and has experienced at least a few years of adult life. I don't like it when one person is 18 or 21 or has just graduated college and is still drowning in debt.

I am inclined to not like this in every genre. Yes, even the fantasy books. The story has to do much more to make up for that trope, for me. Age can be a power imbalance too. That is main problem. I hate it when one person is so experienced and knows so much and the other person doesn't even know enough to identify imbalance.

For example, I didn't like it in Sarah J. Maas's Throne of Glass and ACOTAR series but it was fine in the Crescent City series. The younger character in the latter was adult, independent, and knew how to ask for what she's worth. The age gap was mentioned enough because of the things the older character went through but it never felt like they had unfounded power or say over the other.

Similarly, I initially disliked Immortal by Sue Lynn Tan and A Grim and Sunken Vow (The Hollow Star Saga) but they made up for it by showing how the characters were not on very different footing because of age. (There's also a similar trope in both which probably was the reason I finally accepted them lol.)

I very carefully pick fantasies now so that I don't end up reading stuff with age gap that I'd clearly hate. I unfortunately sat through ACTOAR book 4 (5?) recently because it was linked to Crescent City and I hated the age gap. Ugh.

I detest the trope when it becomes the point of tension in the relationship. This is more common in romance books. One or both characters keep trying to stay apart because "I'm too old for you" but then they aren't able to actually stay away. They spend the whole book saying the same thing. It's very frustrating.

6. rockstar romance

It's always the same. I've read quite a few romance stories featuring rockstars or singers or popular musicians and I felt like they were all retellings. The drama, the tension, the third-act breakup, the fame, the hiding, the trust issues, etc.—it's the same thing.

I don't think I've read even one rockstar/musician romance where it was a fresh take or a fresh story. It almost always succeeds in frustrating me too. I never end up believing in the relationship. Doesn't matter if it's a solo artist or band member or whatever else.

As long as the lead is a musical performer, it's not my thing. I somehow manage with actors and other types of celebrities but musicians, especially the popular rockstar stories, don't fail to get on my nerves.

7. synopsis that say nothing except "i'm edgy"

I'm talking about book synopsis like,

"I've always been the underdog.
Reckless.
.....
She was the light.
Blah blah.
.....
I want to ruin her.
He's the only thing that can save me."

Here are some examples: Pretty Little Disaster by Lilah Rane, Speechless by Kay Elle Parker, Lethal Legacy by Paula Walsh (I found the last one in one minute just by looking up "kindle unlimited romance books" on Amazon.)

This is, unfortunately, too common in romance books. No matter how highly rated the books might be, if they have synopsis like the above, it's a no from me.

8. "how to live"

I read non-fiction books often enough and have liked self-help books a few times. However, there's one thing that will repel me in non-fiction books. If the book is about telling us how to live, I'm out.

I don't mind if it is about a certain aspect or how to do something. For example, Show Your Work! by Austin Kleon or How to Read a Book by Mortimer J. Adler and Charles Van Doren. It's usually actionable advice on a certain thing and goes deeper because the topic isn't so broad. It's also not usually written in a preachy way or as if that way is the only right way.

I can't stand books that are about telling you how to live or be. It's a very broad topic and it's very subjective. It's also usually from a narrow lens and would not work for everyone. I understand that it comes from personal experience and that reading it doesn't mean I should take to any of it seriously. But I find that I can't take it seriously because I immediately see how it's written to be generic and yet doesn't consider so many things. Many don't even address that there are realities for which they wouldn't work. A huge part of these books is self-praise to convince the reader that they've got the authority to say this and that it works.

For example: The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, Mindset by Carol S. Dweck, 101 Essays That Will Change the Way You Think, How to Live a Meaningful Life, Permission to Rest by Ashley Neese.

Whenever I see these, I'm like, "thank you, next."

what are your nope tropes?

What are some things that make sure that you don't pick up a book or make you wary about reading it? Do we share any? Have you changed your mind on any theme/trope which you used to hate?